The Roommates Talk Hating Dating, Owning Past Mistakes, Leading Women On + More

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  • Published: 11 July 2019
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    This week on the podcast Hafeez and Chris are discuss hating dating, owning up to their past mistakes in relationships, leading women on + more

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    The Roommates Podcast is a late-night conversation taking you behind the scenes of “becoming” featuring all the interesting people, perspectives, and conversations you’d experience on the way. The Roommates brand of conversation is entertainment like a standup, educational like a TED talk and enlightenment like a sermon.

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Comments • 43

  • David of Midgar
    David of Midgar  1 days back

    More of these shorter clips please. They are easy to watch and bingeable which means to an increase views and followers!

    • Maxine Miller
      Maxine Miller  2 days back

      We are NOT able to have sex without eventually having emotional connection. Even the hardest and most self proclaimed feminist entrenched women can not sustain that. It is a PAINFUL LIE.

      • The Health Body Fitness

        Healing is Needed

        • Pamarie Smith
          Pamarie Smith  4 days back

          You can’t say a man can’t go cold turkey. He just won’t. Anyone can abstain from the opposite sex but do they want to? Some men, just like some women, can’t stand to be alone. That’s where the problem lies. So until you can stand your own company, how will you ever heal.

          • mickyfingaz
            mickyfingaz  4 days back

            When dudes try to go cold turkey and really work on themselves like getting in shape, concentrating on their job, getting their spiritual life together, going to grad school, here come the sistas on the train, the ones who change their pew position at church, the sistas who magically start showing up at the park for a run at the same time you like to run. It's hard for men who try to go cold turkey. I had to wear a fake wedding band and put a picture of my brother's wife and kids on my desk at one job I had because there was too much drama going on at that place.

            • mickyfingaz
              mickyfingaz  3 days back

              @Moscents40 Houston Throwing on a wedding ring wasn't extra considering the environment i worked in. I don't shit where I eat so the wedding ring and family pics stopped the inquiries about me and the invitations to happy hours after work. Don't dismiss my strategy because it was something that you wouldn't do. It was a good strategy and it worked. any other questions?

            • Moscents40 Houston
              Moscents40 Houston  3 days back

              Where does self control come in? Putting on a wedding ring just to throw women off it so extra, just be honest and leave it at that. Doing that is already deceitful 🤔 rings, pictures who has time for that.

          • Debby Silence
            Debby Silence  4 days back

            You two kill me with your manscape talk. smh.

            • Keola Allen
              Keola Allen  4 days back

              @hafeez, I cant with the theme music @6:06. 😂 On another note, this was a great conversation to have. We have to continuously check ourselves and take accountability for our own actions. Also, healing is SO important!

              • etf42
                etf42  4 days back

                dating is even worse in your 30s, women do not get better with age

                • Ashley Yamamoto
                  Ashley Yamamoto  4 days back

                  (* Contemplative tone of thinking voice) can men not go cold turkey? hmm.. sounds limitting. I think men can do it. do men want to do it? maybe not.. is it maybe the better choice, knowing that more women are likely to get attatched? possibily.. waiting untill you find the person you want to fully invest into sounds pretty fair and practical if your main objective is to find your wife. I don't know, for me.. saying, hey, i've been waiting to have sex with somebody im really into, i did the whole hooking up thing and i saw how i was hurting more women then having fun with them." it suppppper attractive. Maybe on some level, i think, men too find it attractive to hear that from the women their intrested in. everybodys diffrentof cource, <3 good podcast!

                  • Schmidty
                    Schmidty  4 days back

                    Ashley Yamamoto
                    You are talking about alphas most men are betas NOT many alphas. Alphas have multiple women most betas can barely get 1 woman.

                  • etf42
                    etf42  4 days back

                    no, the overwhelming majority of men do not go without voluntarily. involuntarily is a different story.

                • EricVon bush
                  EricVon bush  4 days back

                  Hard in 2019 i hate dating too prefer a friendship leading to courtship without fear of being real with each other no matter what

                  • smilergal89
                    smilergal89  4 days back

                    Y’all don’t want to partake in the game/system y’all set up? Nah - it’s too late partner, continue to put your neck on the line and shoot your shot.

                    • Alma Romero
                      Alma Romero  4 days back

                      Why dont men take the time to heal???? Or to be fully alone??

                    • Beth Stoll
                      Beth Stoll  4 days back

                      If a man says he is not ready for a relationship, listen to him and believe him. If you are ready, don't entertain the idea that you can change his mind. Just be friends and don't let things go beyond that. It will save everyone in the long run.

                      • Genay Nay
                        Genay Nay  4 days back

                        Why cant we find each other? Wheres the bridge

                        • Kaela Wyche
                          Kaela Wyche  4 days back

                          I feel like this was a lot of repeated information from past videos but still a good conversation none the less

                          • Genia Foster
                            Genia Foster  2 days back

                            Maybe it needs to be repeated

                          • MikeBNumba6
                            MikeBNumba6  4 days back

                            @Julius Byes yea i usually watch when they have guest. When it's just them talking it's "meh"

                          • Julius Byes
                            Julius Byes  4 days back

                            Kaela Wyche seems like all there solo episodes are pretty much repeated info. But when they have new roommates there with them the conversations vary a lot more.

                        • Amina Love
                          Amina Love  4 days back

                          Great video! I think it is definitely important that men and women hold themselves accountable. One thing I’d like to say is that even if you are up front with a woman about only wanting something casual it’s important to let her walk away (or you should walk away) if she gets to the point where she states that she wants a relationship and you know you can't reciprocate. It leads to the woman feeling lead on because the man doesn’t want to let her go but won’t commit and to the man resenting the woman for him having feelings he wasn’t ready for, but also not wanting anyone else to have her. The fault is on both parties, her for jumping in to something she knew she couldn’t do and him for being selfish and holding on to a woman he wasn’t ready for. I’ve had a situation that started casual, but once I got to the point of having strong feelings I was straight forward about wanting a relationship and when he said he didn't want the same thing I decided to walk away and the guy just wouldn’t leave me alone and kept coming back. We tried a relationship, however, he just he wasn’t ready, but didn't want to lose me and got mad at me for ending it and cutting all contact. I had to move on from the situation. I don’t blame him, we were just at different stages of our life and moving at different paces. I take full responsibility for my actions, ignoring red flags and for focusing on potential that hadn't manifested. I definitely would never call him a bad guy, he just still had some work to do. Watching your podcasts has definitely has helped me heal after that situation and I now understand where he was coming from. I've been able to forgive him as well as myself. I won’t be making the same mistakes again!

                          • Nyakz
                            Nyakz  5 days back

                            What women say they want and what they respond to are worlds apart! The guys women say they want do not excite in the way that speaks to their instrinctic animalistic nature. Thats my opinion

                            • DE PY
                              DE PY  2 days back

                              What attracts a woman changes with age. I remember when I was in grade school (K-8) girls were attracted to the guys with the most bravado.

                              In High School & college women were more attracted to status. I noticed women were governed by their social group as well. You could be a good looking guy but if her social group wasn’t feeling you it was over.

                            • Wewereneveryoung
                              Wewereneveryoung  4 days back

                              Same with men, a lot always look for physical then get dumbfounded/hurt when the woman ends up using him or taking half of his fortune when they come to split

                            • Josh J
                              Josh J  4 days back

                              Nyakz facts

                          • Nyakz
                            Nyakz  5 days back

                            What women say they want and what they respond to are worlds apart! The guys women say they want do not excite in the way that speaks to their instrinctic animalistic nature. Thats my opinion

                            • Merouria
                              Merouria  5 days back

                              At what point are we going to admit that the type of guys that these women choosing says more about the character of these women than it does about those guys. Their choices MIRROR their own internal personalities and we have to be honest about this before we can move forward and address the character flaws of the guys.

                              • Wewereneveryoung
                                Wewereneveryoung  4 days back

                                It's both parties. No one is more "bad guy" than the other. We're just human for goodness sakes, we all make mistakes. But keep casting the first stone.

                            • SunKissed
                              SunKissed  5 days back

                              I hate it too!!! It's so hard to find eligible men especially here in the Caribbean.😫😞 They aren't cultured to be Godly, Loyal and living/loving on Purpose. 💔😩

                              • faith H
                                faith H  11 hours back

                                SunKissed pray for it, work on yourself, and put yourself in position where structured men are. I hope get better for you lol

                            • Nathaniel Santana
                              Nathaniel Santana  5 days back

                              I've experienced and observed a lot of women who act super casual and emotionally detached when it comes to sex. Usually they've expressed this to be "male minded behavior". But it becomes confusing because there are a lot of women who act detached emotionally and at the same get attached physically. A lot of women have told me that they keep their feelings inside in fear that if they expressed emotions they would scare the man away...so they act like they're cool with just a casual dick appointment when really they just want to be loved. It's sad because women are so used to being with emotionally unintelligent men that they feel like they can't have feelings in order to keep a man until he's ready to be vulnerable, transparent, and communicative... SMH.

                              • Demetri Wade
                                Demetri Wade  4 days back

                                Nathaniel Santana It is what it is. No string attached STD free sex seems pretty good to me. To hell with being vulnerable, she’ll use it against us in the future. I’m not going to get emotionally attached neither should she

                              • Beth Stoll
                                Beth Stoll  4 days back

                                I have now learned that in order to have a successful long term relationship, you cannot get physical right away. I told a guy that things will not get physical right off the bat and he replied "We'll see." No, we won't see. He said, "Well, what if it happens?" I replied that the right man for me will wait. If more people would learn this, there wouldn't be all this craziness from women and men not understanding why the women go batshit crazy. When you have sex right away, that is all it is then (in most cases) from that moment on. Get to know someone and see if there is a connection. If there is a true connection (after multiple times of seeing each other), then go for it!

                              • Cithrah Henderson
                                Cithrah Henderson  4 days back

                                alllllllllllllllllllllll of this

                              • TheSnowFoxParty
                                TheSnowFoxParty  4 days back

                                Yup that's my life. I used to be emotionally open but guys kept crushing me so now I'm a hermit of emotions and I stopped expressing and stopped feeling and just dont give a damn.

                              • ChrissyPoo516
                                ChrissyPoo516  4 days back

                                👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾 this is sooooo real! this is what I experienced for many, many years because my self worth was extremely low. From not healing from my first heartbreak i went into a hoe phase where I convinced myself that I just wanted casual sex but it was really out of fear; I eventually learned that I had toxic pattern of attracting emotionally unavailable men. Thank God for growth and life lessons, now I'm on a path of self healing and attracting a healthy partnership.

                            • Yennette Smith
                              Yennette Smith  5 days back

                              Guys!! I wish people carried themselves with the honesty that you just spoke of!!!! I had a guy come at me like that. I felt great that he said it. I have a lot of respect for him. I have also dealt with the deceitful side. It is a shame for people to trick others into altering their lives based on a lie. I ALWAYS appreciate your content. Great job! 💪🏾💞

                              • Dumfries Spearhead
                                Dumfries Spearhead  5 days back

                                You want a sensational man/woman, but are you sensational?