A Fool-Proof Way To Create Connection With Him | Relationship Advice for Women by Mat Boggs


Comments • 127

  • F
    F  6 days back

    The problem is not me being vulnerable or him struggling with it. The problem is that it appears it’s a one way street: from me to him. I am becoming tired and frustrated with it.

    • LadyShyye
      LadyShyye  1 weeks back

      The kitchen is Never a safe place for children when cooking. You added stress to your wife who was caring for her family and caused her to question her ability to be a good parent. Not good. After going through the stress of carrying and birthing her family; you didn't consider the danger and stress put on her by Playing in a small kitchen!? Not cool Dude. That was some serious stress and she actually came back to apologized for losing her cool. Wow....I found it inconsiderate on your part actually. Guess she could have asked that you take the playing to a safer part of the house but there is something to be said in safe thinking. IJS 😒😳😥😱

      • Hey Hannah
        Hey Hannah  1 weeks back

        I really like your videos. Always with a positive attitude. :)

        • Spooky Spectre
          Spooky Spectre  2 weeks back

          Some ppl under pressure cry, some ppl explode. I'm an explorer, but I make it clear that when I do explode, it's about something going on with me, not necessarily them.

          • Rebecca Romzek
            Rebecca Romzek  1 months back

            Great video

            • nobullshitbeauty
              nobullshitbeauty  2 months back

              I like you and your video love from France :)

              • silver girl816
                silver girl816  3 months back

                Vulnerability just ammunition for a later argument.

                • Insane Pinai
                  Insane Pinai  3 months back

                  Hi Matt, could you make a video about dating a guy who has Aspergers syndrome? Thanks, love your videos! 😀

                  • María Gabriela
                    María Gabriela  3 months back

                    For me, vulnerability is good because it makes part of our human nature, and is the fact that makes us let our egos to be humble and accept all of us have fears an weaknesses. The key is to overcome those situations in order to grow strong roots for our feelings.

                    • Genevieve Tran
                      Genevieve Tran  3 months back

                      Worthy men don’t need all this prep and prime tbh

                      • Biscuit Tin
                        Biscuit Tin  1 weeks back

                        No, but this could be helpful advice to women to find it hard to be vulnerable and so find it hard to connect with the men they like.

                    • Alicia Caver
                      Alicia Caver  3 months back

                      Your wife is perfect

                      • Praise P
                        Praise P  3 months back

                        VIDEO REQUEST:
                        Can you please make a video about Emotional Affairs? I already knows the signs.. but id like to know What does it say about someone's official relationship when they find themselves in an emotional affairs w/ someone else. does that mean their relationship has been broken long before the emotional affair begins? Is it just Boredom or a subconscious desire that drives this emotional affair to seek a deeper connection outside of the relationship?
                        PLEASE Respond!! Thank you :)

                        • Elizabeth Jones
                          Elizabeth Jones  3 months back

                          This guy wears the coolest shirts! 😎

                          • fuzzypeach
                            fuzzypeach  3 months back

                            My mom

                            • Carmen Michaelian
                              Carmen Michaelian  4 months back

                              That story made me cry. I would be open and vulnerable with my adult daughter. We have our differences and it would be a change to open up to her and be vulnerable.

                              • 1LaOriental
                                1LaOriental  4 months back

                                Beautiful Matt. Very heart-warming and encouraging. You made my day!!! ♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️

                                • Antigoni Pafiou
                                  Antigoni Pafiou  4 months back

                                  You are a great storyteller Mathew 😊 that was a very good story...very inspiring !

                                  • Golden boi
                                    Golden boi  4 months back

                                    This is hard. Gunna give up and get some cats or whatever.

                                    • Andrea Grabner
                                      Andrea Grabner  1 months back

                                      It sounds, that I did offend you. Please, forgive me. That was never my intention. Thank you.

                                    • Golden boi
                                      Golden boi  1 months back

                                      Andrea Grabner I’ve owned cats before and this was a joke with the indication that cats are easier than men. I’m well aware that you should probably take care of your animals. Just a joke. Namaste.

                                    • Andrea Grabner
                                      Andrea Grabner  1 months back

                                      Oh, dear, there is a lot to learn from cats. About vulnerability and when and when not. These are one of the most vulnerable creatures . But please, as a. At mommy, only get cats, if you can take care of them for years to come. Namaste.

                                  • Sandra DiBiaso
                                    Sandra DiBiaso  4 months back

                                    Being entirely vulnerable is not healthy.

                                    • 1LaOriental
                                      1LaOriental  4 months back

                                      Sandra DiBiaso Not true, dear. Vulnerability opens up your intuition. It allows you to sense danger and know when to move away from those who would be harmful to you. The world desperately needs more open hearts!! ♥️♥️♥️♥️

                                  • Pique NY
                                    Pique NY  4 months back

                                    1st time in my life I was actually vulnerable enough to share something with my “I thought was partner” and all he did was lie to me. Good thing I picked up his deceitful way.
                                    Left before I became emotionally attached. Heart still hurts a little to be honest

                                    • Mais J
                                      Mais J  4 months back

                                      This is beautiful and useful. Thank you.

                                      • Hira Khalid
                                        Hira Khalid  4 months back

                                        Yeah, vulnerability really make connections but only with empaths, beware of vulnerability with "narcissists"

                                        • charleen hopkins
                                          charleen hopkins  4 months back

                                          what about lonely ness .
                                          i,m always getting attracted to men that dont want me.

                                          • Abc Def
                                            Abc Def  4 months back

                                            Damnnnn you are sooo handsome Mat😍. Well i would like to ask you a question personally about an issue. May i know thru which way i can connect with you😊 thank you.

                                            • PMD90
                                              PMD90  4 months back

                                              Please talk about how to get him to propose without asking him directly.

                                              • maha gharib
                                                maha gharib  4 months back

                                                This is a great topic to share with us..... thank you so much.

                                                • EmbraceTheOpposite
                                                  EmbraceTheOpposite  4 months back

                                                  This is great advice! A question I also like to ask to increase vulnerability or transparency is what would you do with your time if money wasn’t an issue? It encourages people (especially in anew relationship) to stop talking about the small stuff and be a little bit more open about their passions.

                                                  • PR ́s Projekt
                                                    PR ́s Projekt  4 months back

                                                    Any man should discover me, not the other way round! The only thing i do, is to smile at him. When dating i always admit being nervous.

                                                    • Spunky Bear
                                                      Spunky Bear  4 months back

                                                      Hey Matt, How can a woman especially after divorce feel confident in determining whether a man is genuinely someone they can trust enough to be vulnerable with?

                                                      • xolaaxo
                                                        xolaaxo  4 months back

                                                        Great vid..something i struggle so much with! Sigh

                                                        • 1LaOriental
                                                          1LaOriental  4 months back

                                                          xolaaxo It gets so much better, dear. Believe in yourself!!!!!

                                                      • Joanna Kal
                                                        Joanna Kal  4 months back

                                                        Nowadays the standards of our generation set up too high and usually PERFECT. Its so hard to be perfect, because --- we' re human being, not a human doings. Imagine a world with perfect individuals -- it would be no meaning in Self-Transformation & Development -- A Break through is a healthy reaction on your body. It helps you to Let everything out, in order to get over it and move on. The hard thing here is to let everything inside and be shown as a Cold , unhearted person, that doesn' t help you to connect with people and also to connect with your heart. On our society especially boys are being taught to be muscular and tough and not show any kind of valnerability. The problem here is the "weight" that they carry on to their shoulders it makes them to have a more difficult journey but also descreses their energy levels // so does their productivity // .I believe that even men need sometimes to open their heart even to only one person either a friend or girl. << It' s keep them healthy >> . Not only boys need to open up but girls to... Choose wisely one or two #very-trusted-friend(s) and keep them and never let them go.

                                                        #BossAdvice #ThatsabigOne #TopReadIt #BeUrBestSelf #Vulnerability #NiceVideo

                                                        • L DLF
                                                          L DLF  4 months back

                                                          Beautiful, thanks for being real

                                                          • Claribel Corona
                                                            Claribel Corona  4 months back

                                                            Mr. Boggs ...this was a great video. Thank you, I’ve been dealing with many life stressors and my ‘go-to’ is to smile more and not let Anyone too close. This is exactly what I needed to hear especially how your wife was feeling in your example , as I relate all too well. Thanks!

                                                            • marie chonko
                                                              marie chonko  4 months back

                                                              Regarding this video, ALL of our relationships would benefit by letting people judiciously see our "real" selves. I am also a Brene Brown fan and have heard her speak, read her books, etc. I appreciate what you are bringing to the "connection" table, Mat. All good things but it's ALL about us women. What about the men? What about coaching men how to be better partners, be more open and vulnerable, be sexier, more engaging, better communicators, make us feel like we are "it", etc? A lot of guys go into dating behaving as if they are entitled and afford us the lowest common denominator of themselves or they don't have the communication skills and think that it's just fine and we should just accept the "I am, what I am" mindset. I'd like to see how many men would actually engage in your coaching in order to be better relationship partners. You do a great service to us gals so here is a challenge. How about doing your gender a huge favor by opening the forum up to enlightening men on how to step up their game? I'd support that as well because it does go both ways, but you already know that, ;)

                                                              • Joey
                                                                Joey  4 months back

                                                                How would you suggest bringing out the vulnerability in a man who has trouble expressing emotion and seems to always want to be seen as perfect? My boyfriend is 36, we’ve been together for 10 years, but I really see him when he’s at his best. I’ve had plenty of moments where I have shown him my vulnerability, but he rarely shows me his. I’d love to know how to bring it out of him!

                                                                • Joey
                                                                  Joey  3 months back

                                                                  @Hersha Rele thank you. :)

                                                                • Hersha Rele
                                                                  Hersha Rele  3 months back

                                                                  Joey just tell him that you want to have an honest conversation with him and that you except him in all his ways. His strengths and his weaknesses
                                                                  you also share with him that you would love him more if you knew all of him and that you will respect everything that he shares with you

                                                              • LJ Campbell
                                                                LJ Campbell  4 months back

                                                                Thx for this Mat ... great message. I agree ... vulnerability is important in relationships but the key is mutual trust. I really value the talking points you provide in your videos. Concepts are great but sometimes we just need the actual words to say so I love the idea of asking if I can be vulnerable or if I can be real for a minute. Those are great! I’ll definitely use those.
                                                                Thank you!

                                                                • Victoria Sutherland
                                                                  Victoria Sutherland  4 months back

                                                                  My boyfriend is 20 years younger than I am and I'm turning 65 in a couple of weeks. I'm afraid if I share with him that I feel time rushing away from me and I want a real commitment sooner than later that he'll feel pressured.

                                                                  • patricia beckman
                                                                    patricia beckman  4 months back

                                                                    This truly is the most difficult thing for me to do. And yes, you are right bc I recently felt the most connected to a man who shared his vulnerability to me. Darn me for not sharing myself.

                                                                    • Chuck
                                                                      Chuck  4 months back

                                                                      vulnerability is EXTREMELY BAD for guys! Its blood in the WATER! If you show the slightest sign of weakness, you might as well commit suicide, because the ONLY thing coming your way is a line of sharks ready to take advantage. NEVER back down in the FACE of Anger or you will be the face everyone will disrespect for years and years and it spreads like a plague. Girls dont find that attractive!
                                                                      Vulnerability for women is looked at she is trying to get sympathy points and see how many suckers she can reel in! Its a bait game program, guys already know that trick we already watch to avoid this! There are no more Knights to save you ladies, you have gotten your independence, please enjoy it!

                                                                      When someone ask if Im ok for them to share something vulnerable with me, I always say its best to share it with someone you can trust like a family member or a friend! Men are avoiding you ladies like a plague! :Your high risk to look at, have a conversation with, be in the same room, work with, date, marry, and to even have a kid! Look at all those false allegations and always with the guys losing their asses! You want a fool proof way to create a connection make a screen name and find a random person, its truely the only option left! The ONLY men willing to talk to you women are the ones too dumb to learn their lesson and chances are high your a # on his list!

                                                                      • Chuck
                                                                        Chuck  4 months back

                                                                        @Zed - Why am I here! Thats easy, because youtube has decided to do a Mass purge of all the channels I subscribe too and watch, putting this video in my popular to watch vids place. So I thought I would watch and comment.
                                                                        Never stated anything about how I feel, bad intentions, I simply stated HOW things are and gave a piece of what I thought was good information/advice! If anything you should show me some gratitude for enlightening you from the OTHER gender perspective on how a MAJORITY of men look/view things! Dont shoot the messenger.

                                                                      • Zed
                                                                        Zed  4 months back

                                                                        Chuck Why are you on a video about creating connections if this is how you feel?

                                                                    • Zechariah 4:6
                                                                      Zechariah 4:6  4 months back

                                                                      He thinks I'm stupid Matt - thank you so much for asking this question. A question we all must contend with an answer for ourselves. I believe vulnerability is a good thing, a necessary thing, a thing that can build character. Social scientist brene Brown talks extensively about this in many of her works and books. I have a question for you--- how do I allow myself 2 maintain, cherish my vulnerability and be willing to share it when it has been disrespected over and over again. I'm very clear with the men I date - only if the question goes in that direction and only if they ask about my prior experience with emotional abuse and domestic violence. In general they all seem two very much want to care for me, but it says if they forget that vulnerability as the relationship progresses and in some instances repeat the same mistakes of my ex. I I'm very clear not to project old stuff from my ex onto new potential boyfriends, that is so not fair. But in several very clear instances on dates there was just blatant disrespect, I was ghosted a couple of times after being told that I was this amazing woman that a gentleman was excited about our future together. I stayed in my feminine, and allowed these gentlemen to simply walk away, reminding myself that they were doing me a favor by self-selecting themselves out of my life. However it's kind of tough to share that painful part of my past with someone only to have them give lip service to being sensitive to that when they really aren't.

                                                                      So, any suggestions? For the record there were two gentlemen in the last year that I dated where I allowed myself to be vulnerable. The information was shared after several months of dating so it wasn't something I blurted out in the beginning to scare them off. As I said above this information was only shared after the conversation turn to questions about my past marriage and prior why it did not succeed.

                                                                      • liesa scott
                                                                        liesa scott  4 months back

                                                                        You can only connect with someone who wants to connect with you. If both people want a strong connection they will get one. They can't help it.

                                                                        • beautylife310
                                                                          beautylife310  4 months back

                                                                          A man needs to be emotionally mature enough and has the capability to respond to a woman's true emotion. (Of course, if a woman is mature enough, she would know how to show her emotion better.) I have met two types of man, the mature one and the lack of capability one. It is a risk to show your true feelings, but for the mature one, it did help to build connection as he totally opened up his feeling too. For the incapable one, you won't get the similar response as he just responded very lightly. So there is nothing wrong to be vulnerable, just to make sure choose the one who deserves your true feelings. I won't be with a man if he is not emotionally mature enough. If he does not know how to deal with it, then he does not deserve me.

                                                                          • butterfflyess
                                                                            butterfflyess  4 months back

                                                                            youre such a good bloke

                                                                            • butterfflyess
                                                                              butterfflyess  4 months back

                                                                              is it good or bad? depends on the receiver

                                                                              • oddlilbird
                                                                                oddlilbird  4 months back

                                                                                I love the stories in this video!

                                                                                • Monica Levy Tyler
                                                                                  Monica Levy Tyler  4 months back

                                                                                  And how about when we are too vulnerable and the guy closes off because of that?

                                                                                  • charleen hopkins
                                                                                    charleen hopkins  4 months back

                                                                                    so even forgetfull ness is ok?

                                                                                    • Y
                                                                                      Y  4 months back

                                                                                      I truly appreciate your advice and thoughts. Your videos are a breath of fresh air because you inspire women to be themselves and live their truth. I thank you for reminding women to remind themselves that they are deserving of real love.