Everything Wrong with Dating Today (Matthew Hussey, Get The Guy)

  • Published: 09 December 2018
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    I post new dating advice for women every Sunday.

    Many times I have heard the phrases:

    “Men are just the worst today. They only value sex and nothing else.”

    “Dating is a toxic minefield where everyone is entitled and out for themselves.”

    “I give up. No one wants to invest in a serious relationship anymore.”

    I hear you.

    In this week’s video, I’m switching it up because I think this message is absolutely VITAL…

    ►► FREE download: “9 Texts to Get Any Man” → 9texts.com

    ►► FREE download: “5 Compliments to Get Him Addicted to You” → SayThisToHim.com

    ▼ Get My Latest Dating Tips and Connect With Me… ▼

    Blog → gettheguy.co.uk/blog/

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    Twitter → twitter.com/matthewhussey
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Comments • 1 518

  • Mala Murthy
    Mala Murthy  3 days back

    I don't think this a situation that ' we are up against...' as he said.....we women are a part of this system....it only works if we choose to keep with it....IMO :)

    • Emerald Eyes
      Emerald Eyes  1 weeks back

      This is the sad and hard truth: A good 75% or more of the single people you could meet out in the “real” world all have online dating profiles. So it doesn’t matter how you meet them. The douchey person they are online is the douchey person who you will get in the flesh - sometimes not right away, but eventually yes. Most are hooked on the apps, even when exclusive with someone. It’s not the online dating apps that are the problem, it’s the quality of humans today, in general. People are brainwashed into thinking that they are more worthy and more important when getting “hit up” online. The grass isn’t always greener, though. That is the reality. Unfortunately, these players won’t find this out until they’ve messed up a good thing, by playing around on the side, on the apps. It’s almost hopeless, really. Until people wake up and stop expecting instant gratification for almost little to no effort put in, then nothing is going to change. No one is going to have anything meaningful by acting this way. I pray that I meet someone who never uses the internet and was raised to treat people with respect. I might be 90 by then and using a walker, but...lol. *sigh*

      • Wanda Sexton
        Wanda Sexton  1 weeks back

        Matthew I absolutely love your videos and I put your advice in the practice but there is something about people coming out of 20 and 30 your marriages men and women are so conditioned to behave a certain way. Everybody should go to therapy before they're released into the dating world because you have to have the clarity to see what your part was in the demise of your marriage because if you can't communicate the right way you're just going to waste time and let me tell you men in their 50s do not have it together at all. They want a Barbie. They want a woman in her 50s who has 30 year old skin and who has no brain cells between her ears they're so narcissistic and it's so frustrating for me that I just gave up...they can't hear anything.

        • Jace Lansing
          Jace Lansing  2 weeks back

          I love this channel. I watch almost every video he makes. Because I want to understand what's going on.

          • B Real
            B Real  2 weeks back

            It may not exclusively be men, but it is predominantly them who are looking for "next."

            • Christopher Matthew
              Christopher Matthew  2 weeks back

              This is really true. In BOTH genders.

              • Mi Hi
                Mi Hi  2 weeks back

                I think we women also in mistake. we make them view us sexually and expect them to love and respect us innocently.
                also i do believe there are good guys out there who wants love and are brave enough to be loyal and take responsibility.

                • Jay Martinez
                  Jay Martinez  2 weeks back

                  I'm a gay male and for a long time I thought that an excessive obsession with beauty and sex was exclusive to the gay community . But nowadays I think this is applicable for all groups out there like straight men and women. Matthew's videos are definitely helping me to be more successful on dating .

                  • Loony Lauren
                    Loony Lauren  3 weeks back

                    I talk a little toooo much if my crush is in the room and I have no idea why ...

                    • Benjamin Gadberry
                      Benjamin Gadberry  3 weeks back

                      I strongly advise single ladies to NOT online date. It encourages the worst, most lazy behaviors in men.

                      While I know of a few success stories from it, I know many, many more failure stories. I think online dating dehumanizes us. Instead, be as social as you can in the places that make sense for you to meet the person you want to be with. If you like skiing, go skiing with groups. If you like coffee/beer/wine join a club. If you like fitness, don't just go to the gym hoping for a guy to ask you out on the gym floor, go to a gym class where you can have interactions with people. Etc, etc, etc.

                      As a guy, I refuse to online date because I believe in asking a woman out in person, and making those connections in person. I'm not thinking about swiping left and seeing some other chick. All I'm thinking about is YOU.

                      • Vlad
                        Vlad  4 weeks back

                        I dont bother with dating anymore. Too much work. Too much of a hassle to get a person to like you. I'd be better off with money and possessions.

                        • Shruti Kashyap
                          Shruti Kashyap  4 weeks back

                          You're a great human matt. You understand exactly what we struggle with. Unnatural beauty to be certain. Thanks for uploading these videos. Its 3:21am here and I'm grateful to you. Much love ♥️

                          • Y M
                            Y M  1 months back

                            a person who’s been involuntarily single for years and can’t find a single fault of their own? sounds a bit delusional

                            • da ne
                              da ne  1 months back

                              I FOUND OUT THE GIRL  I LIKE HASNT BROKEN UP WITH HER BF. I DONT WANTTO BREAK THEM UP  and I don't wanna be the guy sneaking around with her. Should I tell her if things change in the future I would like to date her? She might be getting married to him. We were talking about business together I hope she doesn't give up on that i'd still like to have her as friend and be business associate.

                              • Victoria Caputo Torheim
                                Victoria Caputo Torheim  1 months back

                                Loved this video. It's great how you can take a seemigly negative comment and turn it around like this, so well and with so much respect. Thanks so much as always.

                                • welshhibby
                                  welshhibby  2 months back

                                  Ladies...TINDER is for hooking up..... you won't find boyfriends on there for fucks sake.

                                  • Tommy Been
                                    Tommy Been  2 months back

                                    Falling in love takes time and patience. But it’s so worth it.

                                    • Karen Vlqz
                                      Karen Vlqz  2 months back

                                      Thank you. Let's get stronger Matt! 💪

                                      • Free Spirit
                                        Free Spirit  2 months back

                                        God bless you man

                                        • serena xu
                                          serena xu  2 months back

                                          @matt How about doing a co-ed retreat?

                                          • serena xu
                                            serena xu  2 months back

                                            My god. Matt is so wise

                                            • MexCrypto
                                              MexCrypto  2 months back

                                              Newsflash, we men don't have to do anything, we are not the one with the problem, it is you women. And it is you and your support of feminism to blame. Long term relationships with women in the western world have a very harsh legal and toxic consequences. Which are bigger than the supposed value of them, specially with entitle women. So we are fine with hook ups and Netflix and chill. See you on Tinder, jajajajajajajaja.

                                              • MBaiton
                                                MBaiton  2 months back

                                                Dating nowadays is not the problem.... online dating is the problem. I tried online for 6 months then finally realized it was highly dysfunctional haha... slow learner or very naive maybe a bit of both. I agree with Matt, woman online are no different than men. I had too many options talking to 10 men at once while still looking, now that's messed up! Online is not organic nor is texting conversations, real world dating is organic but takes longer... patience grasshopper ;) Come back to reality, ditch online!

                                                • Natalie Sing
                                                  Natalie Sing  1 months back

                                                  It's so true I've online dated for years and it sucks

                                              • Peaceful view Background
                                                Peaceful view Background  2 months back

                                                Hi I am a male I subscribed my mom recommended your channel have a good day :)

                                                • Milk And Honey
                                                  Milk And Honey  2 months back

                                                  So many people ruin the joys of a relationship because they live together prior to marriage. Women a man who isn’t your husband shouldn’t touch you before you’re married to him. That’s not old fashioned it wise and protects you from pain you don’t need.

                                                  You’re supposed to discover and enjoy each other when you get married. Women do y’all know that a man will take advantage of you for years? He’ll get you to move into his dreams even if it’s to another country and still not marry you. Then when he meets a woman whose different he’ll marry her?!

                                                  If a man isn’t ready with anything to offer you such as stability, House, car and job why are you adjusting your life?! If he loves you only then wait.

                                                  If you don’t you’ll wind up losing. It never ceases to happen. For the few that made it after dating for years... still find out what lost when he just decided to settle for you out of guilt.

                                                  • Alida Green
                                                    Alida Green  1 months back

                                                    Milk And Honey Some of that is true but coming from a town with a Christian college smack in the middle of it where the kids are encouraged to wait until marriage to have sex and are encouraged to find their mate at the college and marry young I have seen disaster after disaster. I've seen gay students who haven't admitted it to themselves marry a cover wife. I've seen people in general who just dont mesh sexually. I've seen people regretful that they didnt experience more and end up straying from the marriage. A woman can even be basically allergic to a certain mans semen and it causes her major problems. She or he can have sexual hangups that make the other person miserable. Pain during sex. One could have a fetish the other cant deal with. Sex can be so complicated. Things can go wrong that people couldn't have imagined before.

                                                    Yes you should make sure that you know the person better before you sleep with them. Yes make sure they value you and have something they are willing to offer other than just sex but it's very debatable if trying the knot before sex actually helps things last. Half of these Christian college kids end up divorced or married and miserable by the time they are 25.

                                                • Sir Mizer
                                                  Sir Mizer  3 months back

                                                  Male viewer here, loving it.

                                                  • Zoo topie
                                                    Zoo topie  3 months back

                                                    There is a guy in my college that I like so much. We did never talk ,we don't have any common friends. What can I do to start talking to him ?

                                                    • Mac Hilburn
                                                      Mac Hilburn  3 months back

                                                      I’m a 25 year old male and see a lot of issues with modern dating. Online dating should solve a lot of problems, but unfortunately creates more of them. From what I see, most of the problem is with the women. They are afraid to go out and meet in person. It’s like they get cold feet. Mr. right isn’t going to break into your house.

                                                      I work with all Men and never see any women. I’ve been going to different churches trying to meet a good woman with no luck. I have no problem approaching women it’s just I never see any. Ladies, get out there and make yourself available. There’s more good men out there than you think.

                                                      • Chidi
                                                        Chidi  3 months back

                                                        Women who complain about men being obsessed with getting laid should blame themselves for availing themselves to said men who want to get laid. I don't get it. You either be sexually liberated and have sex with whoever you want and shut the fuck up about the unintended consequences you create or you actually raised your standards and stop having sex with men who don't give a fuck about you.

                                                        • Nellie Bjelde
                                                          Nellie Bjelde  3 months back

                                                          I have watched these videos for a while. I think that men can easily apply the information given if they choose to. Of course not all men will take the initiative to do these things but there are men who will. I know because I have a special man in my life who is wonderful, which is proof that there are others out there. You just have to pay attention.

                                                          • Cătălina Ciubotaru
                                                            Cătălina Ciubotaru  3 months back

                                                            Never dated online. Won't do that neither, no need of it actually as I am in a relationship. And our organic interaction is the best of the best.

                                                            • BroTheDude
                                                              BroTheDude  3 months back

                                                              Let's be honest... men are definitely not the ones to blame for the current state of dating. It's feminism and feminists telling young women they should sleep around like men when in the past women were more conservative so high quality men would actually have a reason to want to commit.

                                                              • Myk3sr unmasked life
                                                                Myk3sr unmasked life  3 months back

                                                                Funny... I have a tie and $250 sport coat on my profile, and even have Bible scriptures on my profile... And 99% of my messages are ignored.... dating sucks...

                                                                • Fiona Watson
                                                                  Fiona Watson  3 months back

                                                                  Don't try to change things you can't control - to me that's the key take away here both in dating and wider life. Focus on improving what I can change in myself.

                                                                  • Rebekah Tinker
                                                                    Rebekah Tinker  3 months back

                                                                    I think you videos are fairly gender neutral so not worried about that. Age can bring different problems but weirdly similar ones. I started dating again in my late 40's after 10 years, I was surprised to find the mid-life crisis was a real thing for aging 45+ men trying to recapture the heady days of their youth.

                                                                    I found my greater understanding became a flaw as it made me too accommodating. I found my own insecurities rearing their heads. Do we learn as we get older or just carry more baggage and lower our standards?

                                                                    Our looks are going, time is more precious and deeper commitments....is there hope for older daters?

                                                                    • XXveny
                                                                      XXveny  3 months back

                                                                      Wait... this channel is for women? Crap... :D

                                                                      • Dancing Appaloosa
                                                                        Dancing Appaloosa  3 months back

                                                                        Matt, I went on a date with a guy last night who admitted to watching your videos :)

                                                                        • Stephanie Vulcheva
                                                                          Stephanie Vulcheva  3 months back

                                                                          The strong relations between two in a relationship is women's responsibility. Men just do not have the ability to deal with that. And before you tell me that men and women are equal-WE ARE NOT, we are born different and that's it! Our nature and psychology are different.

                                                                          • эрик товмасян
                                                                            эрик товмасян  1 months back

                                                                            +Natalie Sing WOMEN IS BORN TO PLEASE MEN

                                                                          • Natalie Sing
                                                                            Natalie Sing  1 months back

                                                                            What do you mean it's the womens responsibility? Could you elaborate more I'm curious. I agree with you that we aren't equal. We aren't less than either. We are just DIFFERENT.

                                                                        • Seditious Spyke
                                                                          Seditious Spyke  3 months back

                                                                          I'm not going to Lie. i'm a dude who watches your video's. I found you by lucky happenstance on Facebook one day & a lot of the things you said? resonated with me & helped me behave better in my mental health to myself & my dates. Lots of the things you say that validate women, validate men too & i'm happy for it - but we (the blokes) did need to hear you say this, because i've often wondered myself "Why doesnt he do Talks for men too?" - it's Good to know you're cognizant of this & now i believe i understand why some of the things you say DO sound tailored for men.. & again, i thank you for it ^,^

                                                                          • clarito55
                                                                            clarito55  3 months back

                                                                            I send all these videos to my brother :)

                                                                            • Rahmo Ali
                                                                              Rahmo Ali  3 months back

                                                                              Women who are watching Matthew show, she will be a right and smart woman in the world because he gives a best advice to us

                                                                              • Bárbara Quecedo
                                                                                Bárbara Quecedo  3 months back

                                                                                And What happens with those men that after a year or sometime they freak out and leave the relationship because they are afraid?

                                                                                • PaiN ExoTiC
                                                                                  PaiN ExoTiC  3 months back

                                                                                  I know this channel is usually intended for women but I'm a guy who loves this guy lol. I love how he doesn't necessarily take a cookie cutter approach to dating like most other dating channels I've come across but has a very deep, psychological and sometimes philosophical approach to dating in his videos. One of the best dating channels on youtube!

                                                                                  • magdalena fister
                                                                                    magdalena fister  3 months back

                                                                                    you snitching ad motherfucker go kill yourself jewish puto!!!

                                                                                    • Salma Morales reyes
                                                                                      Salma Morales reyes  3 months back

                                                                                      I can’t believe Camila is dating these dude

                                                                                      • Zen Mode
                                                                                        Zen Mode  3 months back

                                                                                        B.S Game is strong in here. Very cringy Mathew, Very debunkable garbage mate.

                                                                                        • Jackie A.
                                                                                          Jackie A.  3 months back

                                                                                          I’m a woman in a long term relationship and I like your work. I don’t necessarily need the dating advice but I like the psychological points you make.

                                                                                          • Arek Krolak
                                                                                            Arek Krolak  3 months back

                                                                                            Nice video, I think guys watch your content :)