7 Red Flags In Dating You Should NEVER Ignore

  • Published: 07 May 2018
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    7 Red Flags In Dating You Should NEVER Ignore

    One of the difficult things about dating is that sometimes people put a version of themselves forward that doesn't correspond to who they really are. So you can start a relationship, think you're dating this wonderful person and find out after several months that that's in fact not the case. And that's why in this video, I want to give you seven red flags that you absolutely need to be aware of to avoid dating someone that you don't want to be with. And this is true of both men and women and I'm gonna focus on things that aren't so obvious and not just jealousy or clinginess — things that might be happening that you're not noticing that if you did, you could save yourself a lot of pain.

    So the first thing is that if the person that you are dating has friends that you don't like, chances are the person you're not like. dating is someone you eventually will Now, of course you want to treat them as an individual, right? You're saying, "They're not like their friends. They don't have these qualities so why should I ascribe to them qualities that I see in these other people?" And if that's a wonderful feeling but the truth is we are all products of the five people that we hang out with the most. We're like our friends especially if we spend a lot of time with them.

    0:37 Check out the friends of the one you're dating
    1:20 Check out how they treat waitstaff or service people
    2:17 Be wary when they tell secrets that aren't supposed to be told
    3:18 They're heavily engaged in social media
    4:33 They had short-lasting relationships
    5:38 They put all the responsibility onto their ex when they broke up
    7:05 They have the idea of their partner being perfect

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Comments • 2 173

  • Sign of The Wind
    Sign of The Wind  16 minutes back

    my biggest problem is that i’m nit picky as hell and only see imperfections

    • Gypsy Wolf
      Gypsy Wolf  54 minutes back

      I agree 100% with the one about friends. The reason I agree is because there are 2 things that we must share in common with ppl we like to be around, it's why we are usually drawn to these ppl are stick with them; their morals and values. So if their friends don't have the same as yours, run! Lol

      • On Swift Gaming
        On Swift Gaming  6 hours back

        Well damn.. That rules out just about everyone I've met.

        • Fullelement
          Fullelement  9 hours back

          Erm... well if we're a combination of our 5 closest friends... I guess that makes me 2 parts depressed and 3 parts nothing... Actually, that IS pretty accurate!

          • Jacek Z
            Jacek Z  9 hours back

            The most difficult thing in dating is that no one wants to date me, xD

            • Erik Van Der Waal
              Erik Van Der Waal  18 hours back

              Also with point 5, if they can't acknowledge that they are a factor in the reason of not being able to have a long lasting relationship, they are unlikely to grow as a person and break that cycle

              • Anna Sabino
                Anna Sabino  1 days back

                These are very unusual red flags. The no long lasting relationship is definitely an indication.

                • Cherry Valentine
                  Cherry Valentine  1 days back

                  I came to see if the person I just dated had any of these red flags... and I had more of them. Ouch.

                  • Reedy River
                    Reedy River  2 days back

                    Well, the difference between a waiter and your date is that, hopefully, you care about your date. Some people treat waiters better than anybody who actually matters in their life in an attempt to appear nice.

                    • Hatanwig
                      Hatanwig  2 days back

                      Man this hit me in all the wrong places 😬

                      • Elena Aguilar
                        Elena Aguilar  2 days back

                        Anyone else thinking about André and Meegan?...

                        • Parking Lott
                          Parking Lott  2 days back

                          Seeing them as perfect is so true

                          • Feedlocalcats
                            Feedlocalcats  3 days back

                            number 5 & 6 I relate to very hard and it’s always been stuff I wanted to work on but it’s hard for me to see what I need to fix because i don’t do things intentionally.

                            • Becca G
                              Becca G  3 days back

                              This advice is great for friendships in general, not just dating. I've had to "break up" with some toxic friends

                              • Ravatar
                                Ravatar  3 days back

                                I thought this was a good list until the point 5.

                                Seriously dating isn't something everyone has to do all the time, its not an obligatory thing. If someone hasn't been in a long relationship before I can think of a million natural reasons why not. Maybe they haven't had anyone who wanted them. Or maybe they wanted to wait for the one they were sure about. Or maybe someone had a shorter relationship earlier that left a severe distaste for relationships. Or maybe the person watching this video is in his early twenties and its a norm to not have dated. My best relationship was with someone who had never been in one before, and my worst with someone who had 6 year relationship behind her.

                                • BadMonkey
                                  BadMonkey  3 days back

                                  Why am I even watching this? I will never leave my room

                                  • Kate Hartmann
                                    Kate Hartmann  4 days back

                                    Damn. Last guy I dated had so many of these red flags and I'm only 3 mins in...

                                    • Daddy Havoc
                                      Daddy Havoc  4 days back

                                      Na, when they see me as perfect it’s only because they’re observant

                                      • Léon Kennedy
                                        Léon Kennedy  4 days back

                                        If the person is asking you three fiddy, it's a red flag too.

                                        • Diego Pusineri
                                          Diego Pusineri  4 days back

                                          About the point 4.

                                          I'd like to make an exception to people who work in social media or in anything heavily dependent on appearance as actors, musicians or sales people.

                                          Any kind of personal business is included too there as they need to have presence in social media and good image.

                                          BTW make a video about charisma in social media.

                                          • Jason Jay
                                            Jason Jay  4 days back

                                            While i wouldn't condone thinking like this it's good to know that some people do.

                                            • derpy squid
                                              derpy squid  4 days back

                                              There’s a guy who likes me but I don’t have feelings for him but he’s already acting over protective of me, he told one of my co workers (who just called me pretty and he’s 30) and this guy says ‘don’t talk to my girl like that’

                                              Hard nopeing out of there

                                              • Janna Tegleh Poghosyan

                                                I started to watch this to prove myself, that it's good that I got rid of my ex, but in the end I came to conclusion, that he is very lucky that he stopped to date me :D

                                                • Mermaid Nemesis
                                                  Mermaid Nemesis  5 days back

                                                  Where was this video 6 months ago 😂😂 would've spared me some heartbreak

                                                  • lilkoolaidman93
                                                    lilkoolaidman93  5 days back

                                                    "having someone who can't live without you is like having a puppy that can text you. What you want is someone who doesn't need you in the least, but chooses to be with you, because they love you."

                                                    • Maximus Saints
                                                      Maximus Saints  5 days back

                                                      My ex broke up with me because I was apparently too nice, any thought?

                                                      • Maximus Saints
                                                        Maximus Saints  4 days back

                                                        @Ozzy nope, no other reason, then she goes on to say that i cant hate her for it, wrong. You get raised your whole life being told to be nice and treat people with the same respect you wish to be treated, then have all that destroyed by one person trying to make it my problem.

                                                      • Ozzy
                                                        Ozzy  4 days back

                                                        There's probably another reason and you're the person he describes in 5:38 :D

                                                    • TheAllGame Gamer
                                                      TheAllGame Gamer  5 days back

                                                      A girl I dated for 6 years would often argue with me because I wouldn't go on social media and comment on her post or respond to her when she would comment on mine. I posted 3 pictures on Instagram over the course of like 3 years.

                                                      • Alba Hernández
                                                        Alba Hernández  5 days back

                                                        I get the red flag 7, seeing someone as perfect! It happened to me, from the beginning of our relationship I thought of this guy as perfect, and when he began opening up to me about his personal problems or flaws or doubts and asked me how I felt my mind became blank and I didn't know what to say or how to react. It was a big reason why our relationship didn't work out, I understood it after a while... I wish I had seen him as a normal human being, like I do now, it would have made things clearer!

                                                        • Ino Parthenopaeus
                                                          Ino Parthenopaeus  6 days back

                                                          I AM THE RED FLAG

                                                          • Frozenhand00
                                                            Frozenhand00  6 days back

                                                            Wait... So failure to cultivate long term relationships is a BIG red flag and grounds for being un-dateable. So... If I go long enough with only short relationships, I'm basically spiralling into an impossible loophole where I need a long lasting relationship, which I don't have, to get a relationship. That's a catch 22- like the business world, what if repeated failure diminishes reputation and decreases the odds of receiving a fair chance?

                                                            Scary 😱😱😱

                                                            • Unicornbaby23
                                                              Unicornbaby23  6 days back

                                                              People who say “no problem” instead of “you’re welcome”

                                                              • Tarzaan
                                                                Tarzaan  6 days back

                                                                I dont even like my own bestfriend, and we're almost opposite people. Why tho?

                                                                • Rubén Laranjo González

                                                                  I just need to leave my girlfriend lmao xd

                                                                  • Plerp Plerp
                                                                    Plerp Plerp  6 days back

                                                                    Why should you expect someone to keep a secret *about you* when *even you can't* ? If it's a secret, keep it to yourself. Duh!🤦‍♂️

                                                                    • rtgr
                                                                      rtgr  6 days back

                                                                      I think social media creates people with fake lives and make them depressed

                                                                      • Zuuzaankaaa
                                                                        Zuuzaankaaa  6 days back

                                                                        Guess you have never been with a psychopath... No, I have not contributed to all the abuse. This is victim blaming :/

                                                                        • megistotherium1
                                                                          megistotherium1  6 days back

                                                                          thank you for these advice

                                                                          • Michael Smith
                                                                            Michael Smith  6 days back

                                                                            When I saw how young you were, I clicked so I could laugh at you.
                                                                            Turns out I was very very wrong. You’re wise for your age, these points are incredibly well thought out and true

                                                                            • E R
                                                                              E R  6 days back

                                                                              I was dating a guy and things were going well until I met his friends and they were some of the rudest, most shallow people I'd ever met. His friend was super mean to the waitstaff and he also admitted that he borrowed money from his mom and she accidentally sent two payments and he didn't want to tell her so he had more money to party. No thank u, next

                                                                              • tomasz augustowski
                                                                                tomasz augustowski  7 days back

                                                                                Well believe it or not sometimes 6 is just a fact, my ex girlfriend has borderline every day she would pick a fight with me for no reasons, cheated 4 times, breaks up then comes back etc etc. So yeah

                                                                                • Mariya Baileys
                                                                                  Mariya Baileys  7 days back

                                                                                  I’m kind of sad as Im watching this video and was going back and forth on my notepad and dropping some of the points and examples and it sort of turned into a small essay! :/

                                                                                  • Matti
                                                                                    Matti  1 weeks back

                                                                                    My ex was always complementing me, he put me on a pedestal and was honestly TOO nice. You know when you first fall in love and you want to show your best self, he wouldn’t stop. It felt so un genuine. It felt like I couldn’t show my own flaws because he wouldn’t show he’s. I ended up breaking up with him because I didn’t want to pretend to be perfect, I knew it wouldn’t last.

                                                                                    To this day we’re still friends (ish). We have the same friend group, though I realized that I like the other friends more than him.
                                                                                    The weird thing is that my ex still always being super polite (to an uncomfortable level). Honestly don’t know if that’s him not faking or if I’m just not liking him. I want people around me to have flaws, like me, like normal people.

                                                                                    • Sławek Jasel
                                                                                      Sławek Jasel  1 weeks back

                                                                                      God. Good that I don't have to worry about dating...

                                                                                      • Jack Butler
                                                                                        Jack Butler  1 weeks back

                                                                                        I can happily say that I don’t have many of these red flags.

                                                                                        • Idunn Braut Joheim
                                                                                          Idunn Braut Joheim  1 weeks back

                                                                                          Thank you for this video. Thank you for casting light on these red flags. I think I needed to hear it.

                                                                                          • Ninaa Pépite
                                                                                            Ninaa Pépite  1 weeks back

                                                                                            6. Better not talk about his exes. Period.

                                                                                            • mynameadehsenpai
                                                                                              mynameadehsenpai  1 weeks back


                                                                                              • Charlotte Ann Thairs
                                                                                                Charlotte Ann Thairs  1 weeks back

                                                                                                I just wish I was able to find this before having to deal with my ex. He was such a jerk and at first was so understanding of me and was helping me with a lot of stuff I was going through, then he become a jerk and he couldn't even talk to my face properly, he had to wait till he got home to talk to me. He never listened to me and didn't respect me, it was so hard but so nice to be able to break up with him because now I feel so much better and not anxious all of the time, now I don't.