3 Hidden Reasons Your Partner Picks A Fight With You | Dating Advice for Women by Mat Boggs


Comments • 82

  • Pamela Relatado
    Pamela Relatado  7 days back

    Anything you can add about Long Distance Relationship. I have been talking to one for 3 years now. And I don’t really know if we have a chance. But I watched some videos some took 7 to 10 years before they decided to see each other. Pls I need help!!!

    • Cakez253
      Cakez253  4 weeks back

      Not sure I understand why people fight more when intimacy is increased? Is it because you get annoyed by someone who's around all the time?

      • PoemPraise2
        PoemPraise2  1 months back

        Experience this currently.

        • rezotydnic
          rezotydnic  1 months back

          This is spot on. Although, we have yet to have a 'fight'. Over 2 years. But distance has been involved. Ie him working away 6 months at a time.

          • Sarah Mew
            Sarah Mew  1 months back

            I'm lucky to be in a relationship where we've built a great foundation where we are able to communicate our feelings, and able to solve silly fights like no. 1 and no. 2. It wasn't all perfect, but we both want it to work and are both putting in a great deal of effort where needed. No. 3 is usually my problem, but now I've got to the point where i rather send him a ' i would like some lovin' please' text and he'd be more than happy to give me more a ton of attention. He listens and understand its what i need and i don't expect him to give me constant attention anymore and become overbearing to him. I'm happy.

            • Valerie DeMoss
              Valerie DeMoss  1 months back

              Great job showing how our none-conscious mind works!! If it's not align with your conscious mind, it will cause a fight every time! I have experienced all 3 examples because of our jobs & life style. You really need to have an open heart and recognize how your 2 minds work. You can make the work together (there are some great programs to help understand this concept) or ...fight then flight: avoid & feel deprived or leave & be lonely.

              • Pittsburgh girl
                Pittsburgh girl  1 months back

                Omg I love this type of videos great job matt 💜👍

                • Ranie Jordan
                  Ranie Jordan  1 months back

                  Yes! As a solo-parent who has no significant other and few close relationships- I see this with my 3 kids ALL. THE. TIME. (And, I can see that I do this, too...)

                  • elnara1
                    elnara1  1 months back

                    Mathew Boggs, could you explain why some men pick up a fight when they are in a long term relationship and want a break up. Why can’t they just say that they want a break up? Why do they behave so badly, making the girl to initiate a break up? It is a childish behavior and I don’t understand it

                    • Azin Sunny
                      Azin Sunny  1 months back

                      Great video Matt :)
                      My experience with my boyfriend is that we almost never fight. And after a while we realized it is actually healthy to let things out sometimes and have a little fight, without assulting. And fortunately those fights last short because we can’t stay mad at each other and try to solve it quickly, in a logical way.

                      • Mireille Claire
                        Mireille Claire  1 months back

                        Wow, Mat, this is extremely interesting!

                        • Jennifer Ayoub
                          Jennifer Ayoub  1 months back

                          This makes a lot of sense to me, I've seen it with good relationships and bad relationships. Usually it is coming for a need for attention. The key part like you said is the volume of attention that is needed to satisfy the relationship at any given moment.

                          • Tricia Drepaul-Saul
                            Tricia Drepaul-Saul  1 months back

                            Wow! Very informative. Thanks!

                            • Annupriya Setia
                              Annupriya Setia  1 months back

                              I feel like i myself fall in number 3, we have been dating for 5 months and lately coz my bf has been busy with long commute and new job, i am not able to cope up, and its really affecting our relationship. its hard for me to not being able to explain myself :(

                              • Colleen Marion
                                Colleen Marion  1 months back

                                Good stuff, thank you! It seems like these are behavior patterns with anxious and avoidant attachment styles.. maladaptive as they are 😐

                                • Missy Bailey
                                  Missy Bailey  1 months back

                                  I blew up on my boyfriend a week I was trying to find his appointment and I was using my Google map to find it and I was looking vat it and he was telling me it was there and blew up big time but my body doesn't drive he has anxiety bad driving in the car and we going to go on a minnie trip in July and I am driving
                                  I have told him to tell me right or left NOT TO GO THERE he is doing better I have so much to watch out for us in the car
                                  We will see what happens 😒

                                  • Heather E
                                    Heather E  1 months back

                                    Great Advice

                                    • Danielle Burrows
                                      Danielle Burrows  1 months back

                                      Omg me and my hubby only fall out when we go on date night that's is crazy I had identified the pattern but couldn't work out why I thought it was anxiety about change of routine. Love your video

                                      • Elena N
                                        Elena N  1 months back

                                        The camera seems to be very anxious LOL

                                        • intuitive self-love
                                          intuitive self-love  1 months back

                                          Lol isn't this dysfunction? Not being able to manage your emotions?😂 I don't know.

                                          • Jayamila Persson
                                            Jayamila Persson  4 weeks back

                                            No it means being human, you can only manage your emotions to a degree, and you are never at top of your emotions all the time or you never do anything stupid because your emotions got the better of you, you are probably a psykopath or dead.

                                          • Intuitivelogic
                                            Intuitivelogic  1 months back

                                            Hey are names are similar, self love , best drug, I'm above , watch out below , might land on your sailboat, and eat a cantaloupe, while I...... make .. a . fur coat...

                                            That was a great rhyme

                                            Anyways , its definitely an emotional intelligence issue

                                        • unerosesauvage
                                          unerosesauvage  1 months back

                                          This is me 😅 I finally realize why I sometimes get irritated by my husband 😆

                                          • A.C Artist
                                            A.C Artist  1 months back

                                            We are not a couple, he is a bouncer and I am a customer in the place where he works and we live miles apart, so he doesn't see me every week, it would be every month or less and we haven't shared contact info yet and we have a very deep connection it seems. yes, with me randomly he has behaved like a bully by trying to bin my food, after asking me if it was for him, he was mean and asked me what my name was again, I told him he kind of scared me the week before and that is when walked away. I got very frustrated with him. strangely he was highly affectionate to female customers, like he really craved love, attention and affection but I was afraid to let him be intimate with me in-case he might behave like a bully to me again.

                                            • Vana Phill
                                              Vana Phill  1 months back

                                              He picks a fight to leave the house by himself to go cheat or hang out.

                                              • Chem Nrd
                                                Chem Nrd  1 months back

                                                Thanks for the perspective on why my ex-husband would pick a fight right before every college exam I had while we were together.

                                                • Yosi Osiris
                                                  Yosi Osiris  1 months back

                                                  This is really valuable info.

                                                  • Chuck
                                                    Chuck  1 months back

                                                    Common Mathew lets not fight, we need more video ASAP! Your view counts arent what they used to be, how will we get the message out there. . We need to get the messages out there and help as many clueless people as possible! ALL IN HIGH STAKES, LETS DO THISSSS!!!!!!!!

                                                    • Benny Bodash
                                                      Benny Bodash  1 months back

                                                      I recognized everyone of these, thank you!

                                                      • Kaitlyn Barrett
                                                        Kaitlyn Barrett  1 months back

                                                        Interesting, I never understood reasons to pick a fight. Honestly I have not ever picked a fight for any of these reasons. My ex was the one to create these fights due to the first and last reason.

                                                        • Lo Go
                                                          Lo Go  1 months back

                                                          Yes!!! I was just telling my boyfriend everytime he's leaving on a trip he has to make a fight over something. NOW I SEE WHY!Makes me feel good knowing that is more than likely the reason behind his anger, is that he will be pained being away from me. I am glad I am aware of this. Thank you Matt!!

                                                          • dev0n james
                                                            dev0n james  1 months back

                                                            If you get in a fight with your partner break up with them right away.

                                                            • Jackie Kemp
                                                              Jackie Kemp  1 months back

                                                              How do I get my man to be honest.  I'm suspecting he is cheating on me, but he refuse to tell me the truth.  It is driving me crazy not knowing.  How do I get him to admit.  If it is true, I will leave him and he know it.

                                                              • Charlene Bernard
                                                                Charlene Bernard  1 months back

                                                                After watching this video. I am realizing that being single is a good thing. A real good thing!! Great video Matt...you are soo awesome with yr message!!

                                                                • Tanya t
                                                                  Tanya t  1 months back

                                                                  I recently lost my husband. And was beating myself up about the anniversaries we would disagree heartedly on. U have helped me to come to terms with a very painful memory. Which has now become a special thought. A step to closer intimacy. U will never know how u have helped me. Thank u.
                                                                  This message will get lost and u may not even read it. But i hope it helps all grieving widows and widowers experiencing guilt over the diagreements on special days and nights.
                                                                  To all those who have passed...we love u even more now. 🌹

                                                                  • maggie Villanueva
                                                                    maggie Villanueva  1 months back

                                                                    Omg!!! That's why I'm such a pain in the a**! My poor bf... Im always picking up fights when he leaves or if Im not gonna see him in a few days... Makes sense now lol

                                                                    • Alice Dery
                                                                      Alice Dery  1 months back

                                                                      Your last point is is very very true I express this sometimes ago

                                                                      • Nicol Alblushi
                                                                        Nicol Alblushi  1 months back

                                                                        Thanks Mat....theu a really good ones....

                                                                        • Ari World
                                                                          Ari World  1 months back

                                                                          Best video I've seen in a while! Very informative, thank you Matt :)))

                                                                          • Laura Winters
                                                                            Laura Winters  1 months back

                                                                            OMG! Mat, you nailed it. I just experienced this very exact thing. A man that I love very much just went on a trip to visit his family in Chicago and the night he returned I was so happy to see him, but I started a fight with him because I wanted his attention so badly. I also wanted to separate myself from him because while he was away I came to the realization that one of my friends are in love with him and I was pissed with him because I feel like he does things to give her the impression that he cares about her too. With all that said yes, this video was totally spot on and since this all just happened last Thursday night I really feel like the universe wanted me to understand why I blew up at him. He's still trying to understand why I'm upset with and currently not speaking to him, and now I understand why I did what I did. Thanks Mat.

                                                                            • Mais J
                                                                              Mais J  1 months back

                                                                              Mathew, how to ask for attention in a healthy way? Especially for proud partners.

                                                                              • Jessica barajas
                                                                                Jessica barajas  1 months back

                                                                                U just spoke volumes... U explained me, to me... Now im excited for these 3 moments to reappear so that I can recognize it, understand me, (or him) ultimately deflating or smoothing out our feelings and anxieties. ...🙌

                                                                                • Wild Woman
                                                                                  Wild Woman  1 months back

                                                                                  Long ago when I was married, in the beginning my ex would get crazy, while we were getting ready to go out. We both came from larger familes. Somehow, I was inspired to ask him, remembering my teen years of 5 siblings getting ready to go someplace with one bathroom, and, little ones to help dress, if he had a similar experience. Magically these stressful getting ready to go somewhere times ended. I also learned about separation anxiety back then and often said to snarly people in my life, when parting, "this is just separation anxiety". Long ago I heard this question to ask the other when they started huffing, "Where does it hurt?". Thanks the reminders and the clear explanations.

                                                                                  • Lila Walker
                                                                                    Lila Walker  1 months back

                                                                                    This is literally life changing information! Thank you 🙏

                                                                                    • Judy R
                                                                                      Judy R  1 months back

                                                                                      I’ve been doing these lately 🤦🏻‍♀️ especially being in a long distance relationship.

                                                                                      • Intuitivelogic
                                                                                        Intuitivelogic  1 months back

                                                                                        @Judy R
                                                                                        That's a beautiful thing! I feel like alot of men and women have had their comfortability with directly expressing their feelings shaken due to the clueless dismissive nature of alot of people (guys are worse) and this rejection manifested into a lack of understanding their own emotions because they have been disregarded in the way they may have vulnerably hoped to be understood and they may subconsciously feel it's inappropriate to even do it all together

                                                                                        But if a partner cant be empathetic to your emotional experience, as long as it isnt coming from a place that is steeped in being overly insecure to the point that it's actually controlling , they should be open to reassuring you and helping solve the issue or they dont deserve your time .

                                                                                        My ex was a full blown narcissist, fun ride

                                                                                      • Judy R
                                                                                        Judy R  1 months back

                                                                                        Intuitivelogic yes, I’m glad I became aware of what I was doing. I was able to communicate with him and let him know about the video I came across, and how I will continue to work on my communication ! I am lucky to have him listen and understand where I was coming from❤️

                                                                                      • Intuitivelogic
                                                                                        Intuitivelogic  1 months back

                                                                                        You really got to be careful with that, if your partner cant read through and see the truth of the matter or sees it and addresses it and you keep doing it without adapting, it might actually push him away and you may consequently actually lose or weaken what you are trying to express you want more of .My little brother is ready to snap because his girlfriend keeps doing these things

                                                                                    • Edith
                                                                                      Edith  1 months back

                                                                                      I don't understand the 1st one. 😐

                                                                                      • Brytanika Gonzalez
                                                                                        Brytanika Gonzalez  1 months back

                                                                                        I wrote this before watching this all the way. I think it's that he wants my attention more and we don't live together he always gets like this not the cheating stuff but acts out when we don't get to spend as much time.

                                                                                        • Brytanika Gonzalez
                                                                                          Brytanika Gonzalez  1 months back

                                                                                          Could this be why my husband has accused me of cheating the past two nights? Because before that we were so great and out of no where he starts accusing me of cheating. I think he's afraid when things are great and picks fights subconsciously but it's not an excuse. I'm heart broken. I love him and have invested 8 years into this relationship with children and he's also so insecure and has no reason to be. Help me Matt please!! You are the reason our relationship took an amazing turn for the better in the first place, how do I respond to this or how can it be fixed if it can?

                                                                                          • Hiba M Khalbous
                                                                                            Hiba M Khalbous  1 months back

                                                                                            But how to ask for attention in a good way?

                                                                                            • X. Li
                                                                                              X. Li  1 months back

                                                                                              Please make one episode for the topic of “How to ask attention in healthy way?”